Audio Books

Warm and witty, direct and droll, the sharply funny Pam Ayres has been amusing and entertaining her many fans for years. Her humorous observations of daily life touch chord with anybody who’s ever been bewildered by the exercise craze or has yearned after the vanished Spotted Dick.

In this collection, Pam reads over 50 of her best-known and loved poems,including such favourites as:

Oh I Wished I’d looked after Me Teeth
I’m a Starling, me Darling
Will I have To Be Sexy At Sixty? and
St. Tesco

Many of the poems include a personal introduction by Pam.

The Pam Ayres Poetry Collection contains a selection of Pam’s work which has made her a bestselling poet and internationally known author.

Running time: 2 hours 5 minutes

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Pam Ayres at her entertaining best in a live stage show from Stratford-upon-Avon

‘She’s a born comic, in the best music hall tradition, treading that very fine line between humour and sadness. ‘

Pam Ayres’ stage show has been a sell-out success throughout the world. With her natural warmth and wit she builds up a rapport with the audience that guarantees an evening of fun and laughter

Pam’s reflections on daily life bring a chuckle of recognition from people of all ages. Whether she’s reminiscing about the spartan conditions on a caravan holiday in the fifties, or describing her less-than-spectacular prowess in a nineties’ gym, her wonderfully accurate wit is always a delight.

In this live recording of Pam Ayres on stage at the Swan Theatre, Stratford, she includes, along with a few of her classic poems, more recent gems such as Will I Have To 8e Sexy at Sixty?, The Wonderbra and With These Hands to provide a richly entertaining example of Pam Ayres at her best.

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If you want to create a tangled web, it isn’t always neccessary to PRACTISE to deceive.

Here, an off-the-cuff white lie about a smear of blood and a garage door leads two young twins to alarming assumptions about their well-meaning but not entirely blameless father.

We should like to pay particular tribute to Jean Donald for taking over the part of Paula with only one rehearsal. Happily, Rose Butcher, who was not well enough to record, should be back with us for future productions.

Cast List:
Lilian Kerr… Janet Farmer
Frank Cutler… Chris Metson
Cliff Cutler… Richard Tustin
Cindy Cutler… Lauren Ballard
Berni Walsh… Lauren Ballard
Helen Bartram… Emma Savage
Brenda Bartram… Jackie Lewis
Father Vernon Harris… Roger Aldous
P.C. Paula Maynard… Paula Donald

Written & Directed by John Glasscock
Adapted from a short story by Angela Howard
Audio Realisation by Dennis Rookard for Hosiprog Productions

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The Stories

• Introducing the Gang
• The Trainee Village Idiot
• The Viking Funereal
• The Ghost Dog
• Gold Under The Car Park
• The New Rolls Royce
• The Lost Pub Outing
• Pickled Carrots
• Jack’s Girl Friend
• The Visit

According to Author Dennis Rookard, The Travellers Rest is a little off the beaten track and rather hard to find for the first timer. But should you ever be in Brentwood, Essex and venture down New Road, you’ll find the Traveller’s Rest tucked in between the United Reform Church and the old Court House, and just across the road from the Library.
True the pub is not much to look at, being a bit down at heal both inside and out, and sadly in need of a coat of paint. But that’s the way the regulars of this back street pub like it. And so will you.

Written by Dennis Rookard and read by John Glasscock.

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Ever since that long gone age of railways - Whenever that was - Stations have needed porters. That special breed of men who during those long periods between trains, can find endless tasks to perform along the platforms.

Yet can, with the appearance of a train and it’s passengers, vanish. Only reappearing if the smell of a large tip is in the air.

Burt Pride is just such a man, and Burt, a long time servant of the railway, knows that every job has it’s little fiddles and is not above making them work to his advantage.

Cast List:
Burt Pride… Peter Seaman
Jim Prentice… John Lawrence
Sarah… Angela Neville
Nigel Bridger… Peter Mayn
Fred… Keith Flack
Gary Stranks… Scott Peters
Claire… Rose Butcher
Rev Linda Cartwright… Rita Mayn
Policeman… Tony Hine

Produced & Directed by John Glasscock
Audio Direction and Realisation by Dennis Rookard

With grateful thanks to First Great Eastern for location facilities, Brentwood Talking Newspaper for studio use, and to John Glasscock for additional dialogue.

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This was going to be a bad hair day for Julie. The only thing that can bring her comfort and get her through the day is her CAT. Problem is the beast had friends down the road who feed him. Result a stuck cat in the cat flap. What follows next develops into utter farce.

Cast List:
Julie Neave… Frona Mannion
Ben Neave… John Glasscock
Kate Neave… Angela Neville
Barty Moxon… John Lawrence
Stan Peterson… Peter Seaman
Furballs… Marian Neville

Produced & Directed by John Glasscock & Rita Mayn
Sound Effects by Tony Lavender & John Carter
Written by John Carter. Adapted by John Glasscock
Audio Realisation by Dennis Rookard

No animals were mistreated during the recording of this production
- Only humans.

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